Yesterday I asked you if you think it’s OK to spank your child/children.  I also asked you to leave your answer in the comments…I only got a few responses.  Some commented on Face-book, which is fine, some people said my blog would not allow them to post a comment.  Please try again, I have changed a couple things that I hope will allow EVERYONE to comment.  And some just didn’t respond….

I KNOW you have an opinion on this subject, EVERYONE does, come on, don’t be shy, tell me what you think!!! I will even share my opinion to help us get started…

I personally believe we are supposed to spank our children.  I think the Bible teaches it as an acceptable way to correct our children (when done properly). That isn’t to say that I think we should just hit our kids for no good reason.  As someone commented yesterday, I think that spanking is an effective way to teach children that more often than not, bad choices will lead to painful consequences. That pain won’t always be physical,but that is the point that should come across to the child. 

I think spanking should always be on the bottom (or the fatty part of the back of the leg can be effective, too). I like to kid and say that’s why God gave us padding back there, but I think there is a little truth in that!  I don’t think slapping a child across the face or pulling their hair is acceptable for any reason (this is disrespectful and degrading behavior and I never came away from these punishments with the right attitude).

I don’t think  a parent should EVER spank in anger.  I think that is the biggest mistake made when using this type of correction. It is easy to hurt a child when you spank them when you are out of control with anger (breaking a 1 1/2 in thick bread board over a child’s back, bottom and legs is a sign that you are too angry to be spanking appropriately).  You should send them away to “think about” their punishment and wait until you are in control before you administer the spanking.

I think that you should plan on how many spankings the child will be receiving, depending on the offense.  I think the child should know in advance what to expect.  For instance, you get 2 “swats” for disrespect.  You get 4 “swats” for lying, and so on and so forth.  That way the child KNOWS what he/she has coming to them based on their behavior.  I think a healthy fear of the parent is a good thing, but I don’t think a child should ever be terrified of their parents, especially when it comes to correction. 

Correction of a child should be exactly that, a correction (this is what you did wrong, this is the consequence, this is how to do the right thing). It should never be a matter of, you made me angry by breaking my rules, now you will pay. Correction of the child should always be done in love.  When the spanking is over, your child should KNOW you love them. Your child should walk away from a spanking with a renewed attitude and wanting to do better next time.  If your child is angry and bitter at the end of his/her spanking, he/she hasn’t learned the lesson they should have.

One thing I would like to add about child-rearing that has nothing to do with spanking, but is relevant to the discussion…I think it’s important that your child knows that you don’t make rules for them to be mean or so that they won’t have fun. Or, just because you “say so”.  I can tell you from experience, that kind of parenting may work for a time, but it will ultimately lead to rebellion and defiance.  The rules set for a household should be based on the Bible.  What you can and can’t do should have a biblical basis.  We teach/taught our kids that we do this or that or don’t do this or that because God made us and knows what is best for us and His word says…and that was the reasoning for what we should and shouldn’t do.  And also, some things please God  and some things don’t and we should always try to please God in what we do.