too cute…
Posted on July 10, 2008i babysit for a friend of mine…she has two children. one is 2 1/2 and one is almost 9 months. i thought i was exhausted after an eight hour day until i saw these…. can u imagine having to take care of this many EVERY day? but they ARE SO CUTE!!!!
bipolar
Posted on July 10, 2008well i don’t know about you, but i always feel great after a good nights sleep. i got to bed late last night, but i slept really well!! but i woke up with a sore throat??? i think it’s cause i had the fan blowing on me all night???? anyway…. i got all my housework done yesterday so today i get to be lazy. i do have to take care of some clothes i folded yesterday, though, so not too lazy. i have been dealing with my bipolar a lot lately. to go along with that i have what the call schizoid tendencies (psychotic behaviors). sometimes i see or hear things that aren’t “actually” there. and sometimes i have these thoughts that are very loud. i know thoughts cant technically be loud, but anyone who suffers from this understands what i am talking about!! anyway..sometimes these thoughts tell me to do things or just tell me things …usually self defeating things. so i have to be careful to let my loved ones know when these thoughts start as sometimes they get so loud that i just do what they tell me so they will go away. sometimes they literally drive me crazy!!!! i was having them a couple weeks back and i told my husband and he helped me through that rough spot. so now i wait and hope they don’t come back for a while. daily Bible reading and prayer seem to help with the frequency and intensity of them, but does not take them away completely. although, i’m sure it would if God wanted it to!! anyway, i know they will be back, and i know i will triumph over them once again, but sometimes its a little daunting only because it gets really exhausting trying to “keep my head above water”. i always try to remind myself that i can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
missing my son
Posted on July 09, 2008ok, so i’m going blog crazy!! i have a new fixation with blogging. maybe i just have a lot to say?? anyway…..lately i have been missing my son A LOT!! he has been gone now almost 4 years!! we went to the fire works for the 4th and i started getting chest pains..like my heart actually hurt…its kinda crazy , i know. i just miss him so much sometimes. i keep waiting for it to get better, but it doesn’t seem to . i mean when it first happened, every time i thought about him i would cry, i don’t do that anymore, not every time anyway, but i do get these chest pains quite often. so anyway, can everyone just pray for me, please. i really would like that. i have been thinking about him all the time and missing him terribly. for those of u who do not know, my son was killed in an auto accident nov.5, 2004. we (my husband, myself and the two kids) were going to B.R. we were going north and as we headed up there someone ran a stop sign at an intersection going east and he hit us going about 45 mph. my son was killed instantly. our lives were turned upside down andinside out, but with God’s help and the support of loved ones, we are still going strong! this is one of my favorite photos of him….you can see his reflection in the fish tank!! this was taken about a year before he died.
just another day…
Posted on July 09, 2008aaahhh a bright new day…filled with the joys of a wife and mother….lets see. today i shall be cleaning the bathroom, dusting, vacuuming, oh and we mustn’t forget the mountain of laundry awaiting us in the deep dark dungeon we call our basement!! i cant seem to get rid of this lingering headache I’ve had for about a week. its not one of those headaches that pounds and makes your head feel like its going to explode…its just one of those annoying ones that hurts just enough to let you know you have a headache and doesn’t give you any relief at all. i think i need a chiropractic adjustment.
restless nights….
Posted on July 08, 2008**yawn** good morning!! as i write this i am reminded how blessed i am because even though i did not sleep well last night (for a variety of reasons), i am not feeling as bad as i thought i would when i woke up at 3:00 this morning!! do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and dread getting up in the morning?? i do that quite often. try saying a quick prayer for someone else at that time…it will be a blessing to them and to you!!!! have a blessed day!!
my jasmine
Posted on July 07, 2008
this is my dog, who, as you can tell just had puppies …..SEE i told ya i’d figure it out 
laughing at myself…
Posted on July 07, 2008lol….i cant help but laugh. yesterday i posted this blog about how we should have a thankful spirit and not let our circumstances rule who and what we are. then this morning I wake up and here i am wanting to pull the covers over my head and not come out. it’s just ironic how we can say and think one thing one day and have it come back to bite us in the butt the next day. how one day we can be floating on clouds and the next be crashing to the ground. remember how i said i don’t need meds???? well, today I’m rethinking that!! lol not really, but i do want to say this….it will not always be easy. God never promised that. He did however promise that He would always be there to help. we are going to have good days and bad days. so, let us remember that on those days when we can’t help ourselves, God is there to do the job for us. He promises His children that He will never leave them nor forsake them, let’s take him up on that promise. Are you a child of God?? Ask me how you can know for sure…..
day to day life of the Christian mother/wife
Posted on July 05, 2008I believe that we wives and mothers set the spiritual tone in our homes. At least that’s what I have been taught. You know the saying, “When Mom’s happy, everyone is happy”. Do you ever have one of those days where you just want to crawl under the covers and hide all day?? I have those often.
I am thirty-two years old. I have been married for almost fifteen years. I have an eleven year old daughter and a would be fourteen year old son. He was killed in an auto accident at ten years old. He would be fourteen years old August 15th. His name was Elijah. And though we miss him very much EVERY day….we find strength and peace in the fact that he was saved and is now in heaven. So I deal with the loss of my son everyday. To add to that, I am Bipolar, have Borderline Personality, and OCD. Whoa!! You think I must been on twenty five prescription drugs don’t you?? I am on NONE. That’s right NONE. I read my Bible everyday, I pray to the one TRUE God everyday, and every time the Church doors are open, I’m there. That is how I treat my mania, depression and neurotic behavior!!
Now I’m here to tell you , I still have bad days, just like anyone else. BUT I am also here to tell you , I could never get through the tough times without my Lord and Saviour. I also have a wonderful husband that takes very good care of me!! I had a not-so-great childhood and I have a lot of abuse in my past (physical, emotional and sexual), but I don’t let that determine who I am. I used to, but I have given all of that to the Lord and I now I choose to be happy and content. Yes, some would say I have every right to be bitter and sad because of my circumstances, but I believe that that would hurt only me and my family and most of all God. After all, he has given me so much to be thankful for. Everything that has happened to me in my life has made me who I am today, and I kinda like who I am and where I am. So to regret anything in my life or wish it hadn’t happened would be like saying I don’t like where God has put me and what He has given me. I need to have a positive attitude and a thankful spirit.
We, as humans are all sinners, deserving hell. I know that sounds harsh but it is Biblically true. So anything above hell is a bonus in my way of thinking. God sent his only Son to die on the cross so we wouldn’t have to got to hell. I don’t even deserve that!!!! So, any blessings I receive above that I am blessed or as some may say “lucky” to have!! So, in conclusion, remember that anything you have that is good in your life , you have God to thank for it. AND I think we all have more than we deserve!! So the next time we don’t want to crawl out from under those covers, let’s try to remember what God has done for us!! Thanks for reading, Have a Happy Day, God Bless!!